Every mom feels like she is failing sometimes
I regularly feel like I am failing as a mom.
Am I disciplining consistently enough? Why does my 4-year-old still fall to the ground moaning when asked to complete a simple task? Am I pushing my struggling reader too hard or am I not pushing him hard enough?
What if my kids are not learning what they need because I struggle with consistency? What if my kids are acting irritated with each other because they see my irritation with them? What if I can never learn to respond with the calm, collected voice I want to have when dealing with problems?
I feel guilty after I put my kids to bed for being too impatient and losing my temper with them for only acting like the kids they are. I feel guilty that I don’t spend more time sitting down and playing with them — I cringe when I think about the boredom of sitting down to play with them. Then I feel guilty that I cringe at the thought of playing with Lego. You guys, it is one big guilt fest around here!
I feel like I am failing regularly, sometimes daily. Sometimes I need to hear someone say I am doing OK; that my best is all that is required, because perfection is never going to happen.
My kids are going to see me fail and that is OK because I am teaching them how to say they are sorry, to ask for forgiveness, and to learn how to deal with failure. Here’s the thing, they are never going to be perfect either. They need those skills as much as they need to learn to read and write.
My kids know they are loved — really loved. I think they might just be the coolest kids on the planet. They know that I love them, and like them, and that I will be here for them no matter what. And you know, when it comes right down to it, that isn’t failure. A child who goes to bed feeling loved, cared for, and safe is doing OK. I am doing OK.
Yes, I fail, but that does not define me or my parenting.